Second Half Predictions

It's time to gaze into the Mets Lifer crystal ball and share with you predictions of the Mets second half that are guaranteed to come true:

1. Moises Alou will not play another game for the New York Mets this year.
2. Luis Castillo will walk with the limp of a three-legged caribou.
   
3. Ryan Church will become a spokesperson for Tylenol.
   
4. Billy Wagner will blow a save in a game that really does count.
5. I will hate Tim McCarver more with each passing morning.
6. The Mets will wear those silly navy blue hats even though they look stupid.
7. Matt Wise will be asked for ID upon arriving at Shea Stadium.
8. Omar Minaya will take 15 minutes to answer one simple question before the trading deadline.
9. Mike Francesa will recommend the Mets trade Jose Reyes for no good reason.
10. Chris Russo will moronically agree with #9.
11. Jerry Maneul will drop kick an umpire if the Mets get another blown home run call against them.
12. Wayne Hagin will be responsible for an accident on the NJ Parkway because a Mets fan fell asleep while listening to his broadcast.
13. The names, Matt Holliday and Xavier Nady, will be uttered more times than Marlon Anderson and Scott Schoenweis.
14. People will continue to lie and claim that they will miss Shea Stadium. (Three words: Shea Stadium bathrooms)
15. Ron Darling will star in yet another Sovereign Bank commercial where the actor playing the employee will not know whether to pronounce it "Sov-rin" or "Sov-ern" bank.